Under Dog

I don't watch football.  I actually think I like football but I scream a lot when I am watching sports and baseball season is long and my kids don't like anything loud.  So they give me baseball I give up any other sports and we are all happier that way.  I do watch the superbowl. I read the favorite predictions and then I root for the other team.  I like the under dog. I love when the team/person expected to fail is the one left standing at the end.

Tonight while I was making dinner Robbie was helping me clean while we talked about school and minecraft. He asked me if I liked being a mom, I love it came out automatically.  He said "I want to get married when I get older."  I felt the familiar squeeze of my heart the voice in my head prayng he has that chance.   He went on talking about living next door to me, being a teacher, and having a race car. I smiled and said well you will be an awesome teacher. he hugged me and then gave me a lecture about recycling.

I thought about being sad for a minute, about letting the realities of muscular dystrophy crush me, feeling the tears threatening. Then I stopped and I looked at the sweet little boy who had now moved on to box tops and how stupid it is that companies just dont donate the money, why cut them out and send them in? Not this time Nicole, you aren't letting this perfect moment be ruined by this stupid condition. He's my under dog I realized and he has been his whole life.

He struggled to communicate for years and he worked his ass off to improve 90% in 1 year.  He gets outside and climbs on the jungle gym at school. How does he do that when he feels so unsteady?   He has a scar between his eyes from the time I told him he couldnt have something and he climbed the entertainment center.   He isn't into giving up and neither am I.

He wants to go to college and he wants to drive a race car. he wants to get married, have a family and he deserves a chance to do that.   We have to find a cure, a treatment, a fighting chance because thats all my under dog needs. Just a fighting chance.